Just Normal Things on Normal Island – on the *very reasonable* reactions to the Queen’s death and accession of King Charles

So far the reactions to the death of a 96 year old billionaire landlady with a penchant for protecting nonces and a nostalgia for racist colonialism have been, let’s just say, a little bit over-the-top. David Cameron’s favourite X-Factor contestants – Jedward – have so far outshined everyone, including supposed republicans, in their response. Stephen […]

King Charles – Surely even the most ardent Royalists feel embarrassed at the prospect of him being head of state?

Charles was born into a world where he has never had to do anything for himself. And so a future King with all the responsibilities and power that entails is stuck with Peter Pan Syndrome. His shoelaces are pressed flat with an iron, ‘the bath plug has to be in a certain position and the […]

How the Greediest Parasites on Earth Trick People into Thinking they’re ‘Good Value for Money’ – The Windsors & their Stolen Wealth

Royal Wealth Assets Firstly, they don’t make it easy. Since the Windsors play a huge role in our so-called democratic process, hold enormous influence and power, and derive their wealth from us, the people, we damn well have a right to know how much wealth they in fact hoard. An investigative journalist called David McClure […]

What are the Arguments For and Against a Monarchy in Britain?

As Thomas Paine pointed out, a hereditary head of state is as ridiculous as a hereditary astronomer or physician. The hereditary principle is about as opposite as you can get to democracy and meritocracy – principles which are otherwise lauded to high heavens with no anxiety about self-contradiction, as if to say: “We believe hard […]

A Cross between the Addams Family and the Brady Bunch, The Windsors are Neither Hard-Working nor Benevolent

Some of the great myths about the Windsors is that they are somehow benevolent, philanthropic and hard-working. The Royals do run-of-the-mill everyday things and get praised to the skies for it; they reach milestones in their life and there are celebrations across the country – weddings, birthdays etc. And then when they breed (Royals don’t […]

Nazism and the Windsors: A Love Affair

Prince Charles has been known to describe Vladimir Putin, the elected Russian president, as ‘Hitler’. You’d have thought that would endear him to Putin, if anything. If there’s one thing the Royal family are good at (and let’s be honest, there isn’t much else), it’s loving Nazism. Queen Elizabeth was taught to Nazi salute by […]

“Magic” Genes, but Prince Harry’s still Useless at Basically Everything

[*N.B. Comments about who is Prince Harry’s biological father play up to the whole ‘genetic divine right’ discourse and biological determinism upon which the institution of monarchy is built and are completely antithetical to this piece]. Prince Harry is the very opposite of a role model. A posturing, conceited, malingering, parasitic, crass racist with an […]

‘I’m against monarchy but Prince William’s not too bad’ – Oh yes he is…

Wherever the Royals go schoolchildren are assembled to celebrate their presence, as if someone worthy of emulation were meeting them. The media bill and coo about these overgrown parasites and far too many ordinary Brits line up, led by the nose, to kiss the rod. The level of delirium in this country surrounding this family, […]

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